I’m sitting in my room on my bed, looking out my giant windows. The problem is that I live on the first floor of an apartment building and my windows are facing the courtyard where cars drive around constantly and people enjoy their cigarettes as if their lives depended on it while they’re having a conversation as loud as fireworks exploding right next to your ear. I guess that’s what living in the city is all about.
As I sat here in my light lavender rose pink room (my sister chose the color) with my burning laptop on my thighs, I thought about a certain topic that came up in a recently aired episode of one of my favorite television shows of all time: the straight-gay man and the gay-straight man.
By now, everyone has come across these types of men at least once in his or her lifetime. If you’re confused as to whom these men might be, let me explain. The straight-gay man (SG man) is a homosexual male who acts masculine. This is the type of man that a lot of homosexuals find very attractive. To be stereotypical, the SG man enjoys doing things with his hands, such as construction work, building things, outdoor activities, and anything of that sort. The SG man may also be interested in technology and automotives. This is the type of man that almost all women desire: amazingly good looking guys that they can’t have.
On the other hand, there is the gay-straight man (GS man). The GS man is a heterosexual who has some gay characteristics. Again, being stereotypical, the GS man loves shopping, enjoys taking his time to dress up, has quite a number of gay friends, enjoys dancing, and likes to smile in pictures.
As if life and finding love isn’t complicated enough. Now, you have to find out if the guy you’re going after is a heterosexual, a homosexual, a SG male or a GS male. Obviously, if you’re gay, it’s great if the guy you’re after is a SG man, but the GS man is very deceptive. There are actually straight guys who love their Prada shoes and LV bags more than (excuse my language) tatas and pussies. Especially for gay men, isn’t it hard enough that the natural perception of someone when you first meet them is to assume that they’re straight? Gay men don’t wear signs around their obviously-fake-tanned orange necks that say “Hi. I’m gay” or wear name tags on the breast pockets of their Michael Kors powder blue argyle sweater vests that say “Hi! My name is GAY.” Having these GS men running wild confuses the hell out of everyone and makes gay men finding love that much more difficult. Of course, when you ask guys what their sexual preference is, they get offended as if it’s supposed to be THAT obvious. I guess, just like new cell phones with GPS, everyone’s gaydar will need to be upgraded.
No comments:
Post a Comment